In today’s economic uncertainty, the Dhamma (or Dharma, as it’s more commonly known in the West) is as relevant as ever. At least it is to me.
Recently, I joined the ranks of the unemployed. A company that hired me just weeks ago unceremoniously “let me go” – kinder, gentler, corporate jargon for firing someone. According to them, it was not based on performance. They had decided to go in “a different direction”.
I was hit with a tidal wave of fear, anger, and shame. How could this be happening? What am I gonna do? Why me?
Once the initial shock wore off, the practice took a life of its own. I found the spot in my nostrils where the breath was most noticeable, and focused my attention there. Within minutes, the tidal wave began to dissipate. Fear and anger dissolved. I entered a state of awareness and inner calm that once seemed impossible under such trying circumstances.
In the past, I would get caught up in negativity, completely engulfed by whatever feelings arose. These days, it happens less frequently. I come back to my senses much quicker than I used to. Not only do I have tools in place to deal with strong, negative emotions, but I also have a community of fellow practicing Buddhists (a Sangha) to lean on for support. Although there have been moments where the tidal wave started stirring again, I have a deeper understanding of those emotions, and how to deal with them.
When focusing on the breath (Anapanasati practice), I find myself able observe those emotions with spaciousness and detached awareness. I can look at what I’m feeling, acknowledge it, and move on. When those feelings come back, as they inevitably do, I deal with them all over again. It gets easier each time.
After a few years of practice, I’ve come to realize that feelings are temporary, impermanent, and transient. They come and go. For better or for worse, they do not last.
Being unemployed is unpleasant, to say the least. However, the practice has kept me relatively calm, deliberate, and mindful. Although I have a strong sense of urgency to find a job, I’m not in panic mode. I can slow my mind down, and deal with the situation in a calm, rational manner.
One of the basic tenets of Buddhism is that there is suffering, and there is freedom from suffering. Unemployment and suffering seem to go hand in hand. Yet the practice has brought me freedom: freedom from the tidal wave of negativity and suffering that comes with being unemployed. In the long run, the mindfulness I’ve gained far outweighs any financial loss.
- Guillermo Xegarra
